The Thoughts of SES Blog

Grits cover of U2’s “With or Without You”

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And Im waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied
My body bruised, shes got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you
With or without you

Lyrics obtained through http://www.justsomelyrics.com/677297/Grits-(Featuring-Jadyn-Maria)-With-Or-Without-You-Lyrics

Jesus, I wait for You. I wait for Your comfort. I wait for Your return. I wait for You.

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The Dance of God

The story behind this is that Tuesday, I was helping with VBS decorations at the church and had just taken a break to go find my music director to ask him a question. Only when I got to where his office would be I learned he was not in at that moment. So I was heading back down the hall with the windows and noticed it had just started raining. Upon arriving back in the church lobby where we were working on the decorations, I announced that I had to do something, that my momma wouldn’t let me do it, but that I just had to. When asked what it was, I announced, I just feel like I have to take my socks off and go run in that rain. Everyone said, well do it. So I did. I got into that parking lot at the church and just started dancing in the rain, arms lifted up, and I looked toward Heaven and just let God wash away my fears and my worries.

I am no longer afraid of having a rare, incurable disease. I am no longer afraid to serve God in whatever way that will be. And thus begins the dance of God.

The Dance of God

All it takes is one heart, one mind, one soul, one life. All it takes is one breath, one hope, one prayer. All it takes is one small child, one new believer, one young life. All it takes is that to really know and experience the dance of God. The dance of God is not necessarily about the steps, the motions, the choreography because the dance of God is whatever is in the heart. It starts in the heart, moves through the veins, the arteries, the muscles, the brain. The next thing you know, the feet start moving, the arms start moving, the body starts moving. There doesn’t have to be music because the music is in your heart. An onlooker may think it crazy, but you don’t care. All you know is you have to dance, dance, dance. Dance like you don’t care because you don’t. All you care about is praising God, worshipping God. For the small things, for the large things. For the beautiful things, for the not so beautiful things. For all of creation. For all of mankind. And that is the dance of God.
-Written by SES, 2 June 2010

The little girl climbs on the daddy’s feet for a father-daughter dance. There doesn’t have to be music. The music is in the heart. I’m climbing on God’s feet and I’m hanging on for the dance and for the ride. God’s song in my heart is the music of the dance.

Psalm 149:3
Let them praise his name with dancing,
making melody to him with tambourine and lyre!

“Be Glorified”
By Chris Tomlin

Your love has captured me
Your grace has set me free
Your life the air I breathe
Be glorified in me

Your love has captured me
Your grace has set me free
Your life the air I breathe
Be glorified in me

You set my feet to dancing
You set my heart on fire

In the presence of a thousand kings
you are my one desire

I stand before you now
With trembling hands lifted high
Be glorified

Your love has captured me
Your grace has set me free
Your life the air I breathe
Be glorified in me

Oh yeah

You set my feet to dancing
You set my heart on fire
In the presence of a thousand kings
You are my one desire

I stand before you now
With trembling hands lifted high
Be glorified

Be glorified in me
Be glorified in me
Be glorified in me
Be glorified
Be glorified in me
Be glorified in me
Be glorified in me
Be glorified in me
Be glorified

You set my feet to dancing
You set my heart on fire
In the presence of a thousand kings
You are my one desire

I stand before you now
With trembling hands lifted high

Be glorified

Linkin Park’s “Numb” and a spiritual application

Lyrics are from: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/linkinpark/numb.html

“Numb”

I’m tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don’t know what you’re expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

[Chorus]
I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I’m becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can’t you see that you’re smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take

[Chorus]
I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I’m becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

[Chorus]
I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I’m becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

[Chorus]
I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there
I’m tired of being what you want me to be
I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there
I’m tired of being what you want me to be

The spiritual application I found in this is not only how sometimes in friendships, we have older, wiser friends who we look up to, but then something happens, and we start to question that person about everything. But see life is not perfect, people are not perfect. If we were perfect, then Jesus would not have needed to come to the earth to die for us.

But the hope is that things can be resolved and not fall apart.

The other spiritual application, and this is important, sometimes in conflicts we want to run away and hide, not just from the conflict, but from God as well. An important lesson that is getting reiterated for me right now is that God pursues His children.

So, the objective at that point is to accept God’s love and to not become so numb-to Him or to the person who you may have a struggle with. Because if we become numb, we may miss the opportunity for restoration.

What’s on Your iPod?

Posted in Thoughts on Friendship by ses31 on February 20, 2010

I have a collection of over 500 items, ranging from songs, news reports, videos, and sermons on the iPod I have access to.

Of those the first ten songs that pop up (I have it on random shuffle) are:
“A Cradle Prayer” from Christmas by Rebecca St. James
“What Hurts the Most” from Me and My Gang by Rascal Flatts
“Over It” from Radio Disney Jams, Volume 7 by Anneliese Van Der Pol
“Happy Christmas” from Christmas by Rebeccas St. James
“Supermodels” from Jordan’s Sister by Kendall Payne
“Last One Standing” from Radio Disney Jams, Volume 6 by Triple Image
“Don’t Say You Love Me” from Radio Disney Jams, Volume 3 by M2M
“What’s Your Name?” from Radio Disney Jams 8 by Jesse McCartney
“Juliet” from Radio Disney Ultimate Jams by LMNT
“Stayin’ Alive” from Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel by The Chipmunks
Part two of this blog post will have the first verse/chorus of the first ten songs on the iPod on that day.

But I write this to say that the Nick Jonas video post I have speaks a lot about how I feel right now.

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I want to break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore
Nothing is right, nothing is right when your gone.
I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I want to break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore
Nothing is right, nothing is right when you’re gone
I’m losing my breath, I’m losing my right to be wrong
I’m frightened to death, I’m frightened that I won’t be strong

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

I’m shaking it off, I’m shaking off all of the pain.
Breaking my heart, breaking my heart once again

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

Yeah, who I am.

Lyrics from http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/n/nick_jonas_and_the_administration/who_i_am.html

Of Bobs and Jasons (Or My Life As a New Christian at OMPC-Part I) copied from Facebook Notes

Posted in Thoughts on Church by ses31 on February 16, 2010

I was invited to church by a Bob. After the pastor returned from a mission trip to Ireland, I met him. Turned out his name was also Bob. The tone of the worship service is established by this somewhat “eccentric” but really cool music minister named Jason. After a couple of weeks, Bob number one’s wife took me to the new members’ inquiry class led by, you guessed it, another Jason. So, how do I keep all these awesome people in my life straight? At first, my relationship with Bob number one was hard to explain, but now we are just friends. I use the proper Southern Miss with his wife. Jason, the music minister, is just Jason. The other is Mr. Jason. Bob number one is now Mr. Bob and Bob, the pastor, has now respectfully become Pastor. I had to come up with a system because being a young Christian presents enough challenges without also dealing with “what do I call you?”

*In retrospect, I’m not so sure “eccentric” was quite the word I was looking for?!?

“You Never Let Go” post from Facebook Notes

Posted in Thoughts on Church, Thoughts on God, Thoughts on Health by ses31 on February 1, 2010

“I will fear no evil.” I wonder if this too applies to sickness, financial hardship, or any other trial or tribulation that may rear it’s ugly head?

“If my God is with me whom then shall I fear?” Isn’t God supposed to be the almighty protector? After all, if this God who loved me, all of us, so much that He sent His Son to die on a cross for my sins, past, present, and future, then would He not love me not enough to protect me from anything that might try to harm me, even if it is my own immune system?

Admittedly, how quickly and easily I can forget this and instead become paralyzed with fear of the unknown. I haven’t had my appointment yet. That’s not until Monday, February 8. At this point, I can only sit and wait and pray and hope for the best. Because I do not have a complete diagnosis and the stuff on the Internet does not help my natural tendency to worry any.

Worry leads to fear.

I am making a promise this week to anyone that knows me personally. I will not be researching anything further pertaining to what might be wrong or pertaining to what the immunologist might decide to do as far as a treatment plan. I will take the words of Mr. Redmond’s song to heart, and strive to remember that God IS with me and therefore, no matter what, I really don’t have anything to fear. And most of all, for my prayer warriors reading this post, I will post an updates on my blogs.